Dear Mom Letters

For some reason, I’ve had “moms” on my heart lately.  Especially moms of young children.

Some of my hardest days of being a mom were when my boys were all little.

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There wasn’t a day that I didn’t go into Walmart, or anywhere else for that matter, that a complete stranger or two would look at me and my boys and say, “Bless your heart.”

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And believe me, they were not praying God’s blessings on me, but rather saying, “You poor thing,” just in nicer words.

I remember feeling worn out and dejected as I wrangled my crew of boys into the car and headed home.

I was discouraged.  Never feeling like I was doing enough.  I felt guilty if I yelled at my boys.  Guilty if I didn’t read to them every night.  Guilty that I didn’t have all of their pictures perfectly displayed in beautiful scrapbooks.  Guilty that I didn’t have enough money to throw big birthday parties for them.  Guilty that I had to buy their clothes at Goodwill.  And on and on and on…

Being a mom is not easy.  For some reason, we think we have to be perfect, and that is a lie from the devil.

Mom always told me, “God has a soft spot in His heart for Moms.”  He knows all that we go through, and He knows the very important role that we play in the family.

You know the saying, “If mama’s not happy, ain’t nobody happy!”

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Well, as the boys have gotten older, things have gotten more manageable for me.  Partly because they are older and more independent, and partly because I have learned to focus on what matters most in life.

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I think that Eli has gotten the “best” of me because I have learned to relax and let things go.

When Jonathan was a baby, he would get a warm bath every night, lathered up in lotion, placed in freshly washed pajamas, read to, sung to, and tucked in with prayers every night.

Poor Eli was put to bed in the same clothes he had worn all day with PB&J still on his face, no books, no songs, no nothin’!

And guess what?  He woke up as happy as Jonathan did every single morning.

It didn’t matter what he slept in, or how “perfect” I made life for him.  What mattered most was that I loved him.

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I wish I could go back in time to my twenty year old self as a new mom and tell myself to RELAX.  Stop being what the world says I should be as a mom, and focus on what GOD says I need to be as a mom.

I’m praying for moms today.  New moms and old moms.  Moms who are struggling and Moms who are not.  Wherever you may be in life as a mom, I pray that you know how valuable you are in God’s sight.  I pray that you know that you ARE ENOUGH, and that YOU ARE LOVED!

God bless you!

16 Comments

  1. Such a sweet post, Traci — I struggle in my role as a stepmom sometimes, the boundaries that are there. Though I consider my stepsons “mine” and love them with all my heart, I lots of “I wonder if…” moments, if I’m enough, if I’m fair, if I’m unconditional. Just have to keep turning to him to guide me. <3 you, sweet friend, and your heart for mamas of all sorts!
    xo Heidi

  2. Traci, you have such a kind and beautiful heart…Jesus really shines through you. Thanks for the hug of encouragement to all of us moms of young ones when we are weary. Your boys are blessed to have you as their mama!! You can see it in the peaceful joy on their faces. Loved all the sweet photos!You are right that what matters most is love and that our little ones know when they are loved : )

  3. Great post and so true. As the mother of three boys, I’ve experienced the same, “Bless your heart!” moments. I remember the guilty feelings too and the trying to be the perfect mom. Young mothers will be blessed by this post and your recommendations!

  4. I still hang on to the, “God has a soft spot in His heart for moms.” :-) A lot of what you’ve told me…I still hang on to!

  5. What a great post that I totally needed to read. Yesterday, I caught my 1 year old (also an Eli:)) eating a banana peel with coffee grounds on it out of the trash can! We’re in the middle of a flooring project and things are totally insane. Guilt. Guilt. GUILT!

    1. Ha! Too funny! Eli’s just fine and enjoying life along with you. :) Don’t sweat the small stuff {and it’s all small stuff.} hee.hee.

  6. Thanks Traci! I’m 24 weeks along with my fifth baby on the way, a girl! My others are 10, 6, 4, and 2 now and it was all getting easier and more manageable for a while. Now I’m starting over, Im blessed beyond belief and also tired beyond belief sometimes and I appreciate seeing other moms like yourself with several children loving their babies and all that comes with a big family. Thank you for your prayers.

    1. FIVE!? Wow, you’ve got me beat! :) Your cup overflows with blessings. Congrats on your new baby, and God bless your family. I know you are weary at times, but God will fill you up and you are receiving a heavenly reward just not seen yet with our earthly eyes.

  7. Precious post, Traci. I have always loved Rachel’s “Dear Mom” posts. I had the great pleasure of meeting her and hearing her speak at Beech Retreat which started one year ago today. Wow – that’s a fluke. :)
    Thanks for this great reminder to all of us Moms. xoxo

  8. I don’t think I have ever commented – but after that post I feel like I need to stop in and say Hi!

    I’m a long time reader and I wish you lived closer. I would try to convince you to be my mentor! I also have four boys (you nailed it with the ‘Bless your heart” grocery store comment!)

    I love reading your perspective about everything – from raising four boys, to Christianity, to motherhood, to home decor!

    Thanks for sharing!

    1. You are so sweet, Lisa! I wish we lived closer too! Moms of all boys need all the encouragement they can get. :) Thank you for following my blog, and I’m humbled that I can be an encouragement to you.
      Blessings!

  9. Sweet post, Traci. I got a kick out of how Eli goes to bed sometimes. I learned when our girls were little just how
    resilient children are. With my husband being a preacher, there were many nights when we would travel to meetings with him and get back home late at night. Of course they slept all the way home (3 girls in the back seat and one in the front between us) and we would just carry them and put them to bed in their cothes when we
    Got home. I know some mothers woul gasp at that, but it did not hurt them at all! In fact they are now all 4 married and are wonderful mothers to their own children. Their memories of their childhood are cherished ones. I think it’s because of all the sweet times we spent together, and because they knew. As you said, that we lived them. Of course on a normal night there were baths and stories, but an occasional one without routines did not kill them!

  10. Thank you for this! I feel like I’m in over my head these days! Thanks for sharing a little about your journey and sending encouragement my way:)

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