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Beneath My Heart

Home without our Girl

FAITH & FAMILY

20 Dec

 

From instagram…

Screen Shot 2015-12-20 at 8.48.48 AM Screen Shot 2015-12-20 at 8.48.53 AM

56 Comments

« Reader’s Christmas Home Tour – Day 3!
Reader’s Christmas Home Tours – Day Four! »

Comments

  1. Laura C says

    December 20, 2015 at 9:33 am

    Prayers are being sent to heal your hurt.

    Reply
  2. Sonja says

    December 20, 2015 at 10:10 am

    Oh please know we are praying for you all, and for your precious girl, that God holds all of you close right now and in the days ahead. He knows…

    Reply
  3. Sheila says

    December 20, 2015 at 11:51 am

    i am so sorry. Lord be with you and your family.

    Reply
  4. Marty@A Stroll Thru Life says

    December 20, 2015 at 12:06 pm

    Praying

    Reply
  5. Michelle says

    December 20, 2015 at 12:11 pm

    I am so sad for all of you. Praying God will reveal his plans to you, so this can make some sense. Praying God will hold you close in his arms.

    Reply
  6. deb says

    December 20, 2015 at 12:30 pm

    Prayers going out

    Reply
  7. Rebecca says

    December 20, 2015 at 1:16 pm

    Oh my goodness Traci. I am so so sorry. I am so sad myself but I can’t imagine the loss you must feel and how heartbroken you all must be. I know we as humans want to question Him and we don’t always understand why things happen the way they do sometimes but He knows why. I pray your hearts are comforted and you feel God’s grace during this sad time.

    Reply
  8. Erin says

    December 20, 2015 at 2:19 pm

    Traci, my heart breaks for your family and for your sweet girl! I pray that someday it all makes sense but until then, may He wrap his loving arms around you and give you strength! Wishing your beautiful family a Merry Christmas!

    Reply
  9. sondra spencer says

    December 20, 2015 at 3:05 pm

    Praying for your family.

    Reply
  10. Jane says

    December 20, 2015 at 3:30 pm

    So sad, as a Grandmom of 4 sweet ones who were all adopted, I know the ups, downs, uncertainty and disappointment adoption sometimes brings. Take time to breathe, hug, grieve and rejoice in the fact she will always be held close in your hearts and is woven tightly into your family story.

    Reply
  11. teresa says

    December 20, 2015 at 3:35 pm

    My heart is breaking for you. I wasn’t expecting this news. Who can say why, but you did your best and opened your heart. Better that with its consequent pain, than to have closed yourself off to a selfless love.

    Reply
  12. Gail Golden says

    December 20, 2015 at 4:05 pm

    Praying for you, dear Tracey, for your family, and for your girl. A wise woman told me this one time, and it has helped me many times: “G-d leads by stops as well as starts.” I know your are heart-broken, and my love goes out to you.
    GG

    Reply
  13. Nancy says

    December 20, 2015 at 4:34 pm

    Our family is praying for you all and your girl! Somehow God will work all this together for good! Romans 8:28

    Reply
  14. Nancy says

    December 20, 2015 at 4:35 pm

    We are praying for you all!

    Reply
  15. Barbara Galloway says

    December 20, 2015 at 4:38 pm

    I know how you feel, except for us, I was the one who stopped the proceedings. The matron at the children’s home told me we could have one certain child. I asked where her parents were. She said in the same town we lived in. The child was 6 years old. She knew who her parents were. I could not walk down the street with her for thinking every woman we passed was her mother.

    Reply
  16. Deanna says

    December 20, 2015 at 5:49 pm

    I am so sad for you. I know your hearts are broken. So very sorry. I’m not sure what country you were working with on this adoption, but I know that adoption is possible. Many would be so very blessed to call you Mom. God will get you through this disappointment. He is faithful.

    Reply
  17. ann says

    December 20, 2015 at 6:55 pm

    Yes, of course, I’ll pray. I am so, so sorry for you all.

    Reply
  18. jenifer says

    December 20, 2015 at 7:07 pm

    Oh my heart is crying for you. Lifting prayers to heaven for everyone involved, especially your precious girl.

    Reply
  19. Amy says

    December 20, 2015 at 8:47 pm

    Yes, God’s good can come out of any situation. He has a perfect plan for your family and for the little girl you all fell in love with. I am so THANKFUL you got to be a part of her life, even for just a short season. Good seeds were planted into her life… To the praise of His glory!

    Reply
  20. Tanya Ray says

    December 20, 2015 at 9:18 pm

    Traci, I feel like I know you. I’ve been reading your blog for years. I’ve been praying for you and your family since I read your post. My heart aches for all of you. I am so sorry you are having to go thru this difficult situation.

    Reply
  21. Gail says

    December 20, 2015 at 11:31 pm

    Traci, when you posted that you trusted God even though you might not always understand, I wondered if something might have not gone as planned. I am so sorry. Please know that I will be lifting you up in prayer. Maybe we can have lunch sometime. A good verse to lean on is “But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.”
    ‭‭Job‬ ‭23:10‬ ‭KJV‬‬

    Reply
  22. Felicia says

    December 20, 2015 at 11:47 pm

    Praying for your broken hearts and this precious little girl. When you can’t see His hand, trust His heart. 💕

    Reply
  23. Cheryl says

    December 21, 2015 at 12:05 am

    Oh Traci, I am so sorry for you, Cy and the boys. Will be praying for you all and your sweet girl. Sending hugs your way.

    Reply
  24. SilvanaJoanne says

    December 21, 2015 at 7:18 am

    Traci, I just read this and I am so truly sorry things didn’t go as planned. I can only image the heart break…Rest assured that you and your little girl will be in my prayers. Sending hugs, Silvana

    Reply
  25. Rachelle says

    December 21, 2015 at 7:37 am

    I am very sorry to hear the sad news you were not able to bring your little girl home with you. I have been thinking of you the last few weeks waiting to see a joyous photo of you all together as a family. Once you have gatherered your barings I hope you are able to share what happened so suddenly. You have shared the journey thus far & with such a devastating ending it may help others on their journey better emotionally prepare. Without knowing what happened I will continue to think positively for all of you & that you will be reunited soon, forever. I have been through traumas & losses in my life & strongly believe they can make you stronger & allow you to grow even though they are painful & you don’t understand or have answers (as have you also). I will be honest, it seems incredibly cruel that Cy & yourself left with the impression you would be bringing her home & that she had more time together with you both to grow closer. How difficult that must be for her & the heartbreak & confusion your boys must have felt so far away from everything going on. You invested your entire selves physically, mentally, emotionally & obviously financially to travel & take her home with you. The positive to take is that she brought something to your life you didn’t know was missing & you gave something to her life that can never be taken away. I hope she was not being used as a pawn from the other side as that would just be incredibly cruel to that poor little girls being. Sorry again to hear that sad & painful news.

    Reply
  26. Jenny V. says

    December 21, 2015 at 8:42 am

    Hi Traci . . .yes, it’s your teaching partner Jenny! I am soooo sorry!! Will be praying for you all!!

    Reply
  27. Libby says

    December 21, 2015 at 9:00 am

    So sorry for your heartbreak! You and this little girl will both be in my prayers!

    Reply
  28. Susan A says

    December 21, 2015 at 9:41 am

    Oh Traci. Prayers for you, Cy and the boys…as especially for your precious little girl. I’m so, so sorry. (((hugs)))

    Reply
  29. Michelene Witthuhn says

    December 21, 2015 at 10:38 am

    I’m so sorry!!! Been following you for years. Can’t believe something so painful has happened. Many prayers.

    Reply
  30. Melissa Lamons says

    December 21, 2015 at 10:40 am

    Oh no:( Prayers your way.

    Reply
  31. Bertie DeWane says

    December 21, 2015 at 5:52 pm

    Traci, I stopped at work and said a prayer for you and your family and that sweet girl who was to be a part of you family. My heart is broken for you.

    Reply
  32. Andrea says

    December 21, 2015 at 6:32 pm

    I’m so sorry, Traci…praying for the Lord’s peace which surpasses understanding…that your little girl would be protected under the shadow of His wings and that she would learn of Him and know Him as her everloving Savior. Praying for joy during this Christmas season. Many blessings!

    Reply
  33. Teresa says

    December 21, 2015 at 8:24 pm

    Tracey, This brought tears to my eyes, I am so very sorry. God knows best and there is a reason. You may not know it yet or see it. But in time God will let you know why. I will be praying for you and your families hurt and disappointments. I will be crying out for your daughter and your family. (((( HUGS)))))
    Teresa

    Reply
  34. Chris says

    December 21, 2015 at 10:29 pm

    I am so sorry… Thank goodness we can go to the Lord and trust in him during these times. I will be praying for you.
    In his love,
    Chris

    Reply
  35. debbie delosreyes says

    December 21, 2015 at 11:18 pm

    My heart hurts for your family during this tough time. Prayers for all of you!

    Debbie

    Reply
  36. AK says

    December 22, 2015 at 12:07 am

    I’m am so sorry. Saying prayers for you all.

    Reply
  37. Tilly says

    December 22, 2015 at 3:51 am

    :(( I’m so sorry, Traci. God will bring her back to you and the boys, you’ll see. There’s a reason you met her. Do whatever it takes and God will help!

    Reply
  38. Sonja says

    December 22, 2015 at 6:41 am

    Dear Traci and Cy, my heart goes out to you and your sons and your little girl. The hammer of life falls so hard sometimes it crushes and splinters us and we are not the same. The Man of Sorrows, familiar with grief, walks with you on this broken road. I pray for you all. Sending you love.

    Reply
  39. Connie says

    December 22, 2015 at 11:56 am

    My heart hurts for you. God has a plan, and may His will be done in your life and the life of your precious girl. One thing is for sure, your family has been a blessing to her, and she to you. That alone is a miracle. Love never fails…let that sustain you through your disappointment and loss.

    Reply
  40. Roberta Cordell says

    December 22, 2015 at 12:17 pm

    I have no words of comfort but I will be lifting your precious girl and your family in my prayers.

    Reply
  41. Sue Krznaric says

    December 22, 2015 at 4:40 pm

    Traci,
    Sometimes in life you know you’ve been brought into someone’s life [or computer :-)] in order to pray for them. I haven’t been a reader very long, but I feel right now that that’s why I’m here. To be, as I am, one of many praying for you, Cy, your sons and especially your little girl. May God grant you comfort and make right this situation, whatever ‘right’ may be.

    Reply
  42. Donnella says

    December 22, 2015 at 11:24 pm

    Traci, I’m speechless over this news but will pray for your precious girl. Even though she isn’t in your home this Christmas, she is already part of your family and will be forever. Praying God’s perfect will for her and the rest of your precious family.

    Reply
  43. Channon Craig says

    December 23, 2015 at 9:06 am

    I’m so sorry! I’ll be praying for you and your family. And especially a little girl that probably doesn’t understand all this adult stuff. I pray that she has someone to lean on during this heartbreaking disappointment.

    Reply
  44. Lucy says

    December 25, 2015 at 6:47 am

    I am so sorry to read this news. My heart is sad for you all. God has a different plan for you all. Have a very Blessed and Merry Christmas. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Reply
  45. Kim V. says

    December 26, 2015 at 9:43 am

    So sorry, praying for understanding and healing.

    Reply
  46. Debra@shoppeno5 says

    December 26, 2015 at 9:50 am

    I was shocked and saddened to learn the adoption did not go through. I know God has a special plan and you won’t give up hope. Prayers it is all resolved in your favor.

    Reply
  47. Debbie says

    December 26, 2015 at 11:40 am

    Dear Traci,
    I have been waiting to read the update and I
    am so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are
    with you and your family. May the love and support of family and friends and your devotion to your husband and adorable little boys help you through this heartbreak. Take care,Traci. God bless you and your family.

    Reply
  48. Marcia says

    December 26, 2015 at 2:57 pm

    I want you know that God treasures the tears from a broken heart. “Blessed are they who mourn,for they shall be comforted.” From experience I can say don’t try to figure out all the “why’s” right now. Take the time to let the Holy Spirit minister comfort to you broken hearts. Blessings and prayers for your whole family.

    Reply
  49. Susan says

    December 28, 2015 at 7:15 am

    I’m so sorry, Traci.

    Reply
  50. Susan says

    December 28, 2015 at 8:43 pm

    Oh Traci, I was so shocked and saddened to hear this news. We are sending up many prayers for your family and this precious girl, held in the hands of our Almighty, all-powerful Savior.

    Reply
  51. Tonja G says

    December 28, 2015 at 9:43 pm

    Dearest…praying and sending you such love.
    For her…protection & comfort.
    For you…peace, in this valley.

    Reply
  52. Lisa E says

    December 28, 2015 at 10:31 pm

    I am sso sorry. To learn of this news. My prayers for you and especially that special little girl.

    Reply
  53. Jill says

    December 28, 2015 at 11:01 pm

    I am heartbroken for your family and will be keeping you all in my prayers, especially your sweet girl.

    Reply
  54. Charisse says

    January 2, 2016 at 7:35 am

    Dear Traci and Cy, My heart aches for you and your sons, and for your dear, precious little girl. I cannot imagine the confusion and heartbreak you are experiencing. I pray that it somehow works out in whatever way it is meant to. Blessings to you all.

    Reply
  55. Alli Hunter says

    January 2, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    I’m so sorry. I can’t begin to know what that feels like, but I’ve known devastation, when this world and the things of it have knocked the wind right out of me. I hate that you and your family are suffering. All I can think of is the hymn- Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus. ” and the things of earth will grow strangely dim…” That’s what I am praying now, that in your heart, His kingdom would be magnified and His sovereignty would be so clear. Praying for overwhelming peace that surpasses all understanding. Be blessed, love. Be comforted. (((Hugs)))

    Reply
  56. Lynne Gaylor says

    January 6, 2016 at 12:28 am

    So terribly sorry to hear of your heartbreak…..May God comfort you and protect you and your little girl…..God Bless.

    Reply

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