Matters of the Heart: Insecurity

A couple of weeks ago, I was in Nashville for the Blissdom Conference.  It was an amazing experience!

I had so much fun hanging out with my favorite bloggers and learning more ways to grow my blog.


We laughed, and hugged, and talked and talked and talked.  My kind of conference!

But I have to be honest and tell you that I struggled with something while I was there.


Have you ever struggled with it?

It comes from a place when we do not feel “secure” in who we are.

And we usually do not feel secure when we try and compare ourselves to others.

“I wish my home was as big as….”

“Her kids always look so perfect, and my kids have stains on their shirts.”

“I wish I had money to spend on my hair and clothes, like so and so.”

“Why do I have so many wrinkles at my age?”

“I need to loose weight, so I can look like…”

“I’m not a good wife.”

“I wish I had more patience with my kids.  I yell too much.  I’m a horrible mom.”


I have thought all of these things at one time or another.

Well, at Blissdom, I guess you could say I was struggling with Blog Insecurity.

Each night as I went back to my room,  my insecurities would begin to surface.

Negative little whispers in my head.

“What are you doing here, Traci?”

“Has anyone figured out yet that you are not that talented?”

“Well, you can do some good things on your blog, but you will never be as good as (insert name).”

“You’ve got big dreams for your blog, Traci, but don’t be naive.  It will never happen.”

Those whispers would roll around and around in my head each night as I tried to sleep.

And I began to doubt my abilities and my worth.

I was so thankful to be able to attend a Thursday morning prayer breakfast while at Blissdom.

I woke up that morning heavy hearted, and I knew that talking to Jesus about it would give me peace.

It’s that peace that I saw displayed so strongly in my mom as she faced death.

A peace that passes all understanding.

“My peace I give to you. My peace I leave with you.  Not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid.”  John 14:27

As I held hands with other believers that morning and prayed, my burdens were lifted, and I felt God’s love pierce my insecure heart.

What a peace I find in knowing that God loves me no matter what…

But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger,

abounding in love and faithfulness (Psalm 86:15).


That he has a perfect plan for me and my life…

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,

“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

(Jeremiah 29:11-13)



And that nothing can separate me from the love of Christ…

For I am convinced that neither death nor life,

neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future,

nor any powers,  neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation,

will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

(Romans 8:38-39)


Knowing these promises wipes away my insecurities because I know that I am SECURE in Christ.

I will never be the perfect mom or wife.  My blog will never be the biggest or the best.  Wrinkles will come and so will the pounds.

But life is more than those things.

Life is about knowing and loving Jesus Christ.

As I was at Blissdom, an old Amy Grant song kept coming up in my head.  (I was a huge Amy Grant fan in middle and high school.  Her music deepened my faith as a young girl full of insecurities.)

The words of the song that kept coming to my mind were, “All I ever have to be, is what You’ve made in me.”

That’s the bottom line.

All I ever have to be, is what God made me.  I am full of sin, but He is full of forgiveness.  I can trust Him to show me the way through this crazy life.

If you haven’t heard this song before, here it is.

The reason I shared these thoughts is because I know that I am not the only one who struggles with insecurities.  I never want to appear on my blog as someone who has it all together.  I do not.

My prayer for you today is that you would know how great God’s love is for you and that you would find your security in Him.


  1. I have been struggling with blogging insecurity too. My blog is only 5 months old and has grown so quickly. You would think i would be thrilled but it makes me even more aware of my short comings. I thought I would have more time to figure this blogging thing out before I got a lot of readers. I feel like I am stumbling around. And then sometimes that ugly green monster (envy) rears his head and I am jealous of other bloggers who seem to have it all figured out. Bloggers (like you) who have pretty sites. I feel like I am all over the place! I have prayed my guts out. I want to be comfortable with my blog, my ablilities, and me in general. I am glad I am not the only one who struggles. You are amazing.

  2. Thanks for being so honest and having such faith! I think all bloggers feel like you do sometimes. I know I certainly do. The blogging world is HUGE and if you view other blogs as “competition”, it truly becomes overwhelming. I did that for awhile. My blog was doing amazing because I was spending all of my free time commenting on other blogs and doing anything I could to get readers. I got so burnt out, I basically quit blogging for a year, lost many of my readers and looked at it as a chore.

    I came back to it recently with a new energy for it! I no longer blog just to gain readers. I blog for myself, my friends and family that love it, and hopefully to inspire readers in some way. If I gain friends/readers along the way-AWESOME! If I don’t, I’m ok with that too.

    Keep going-your blog is great :)

  3. Thanks for this post today Traci. I totally have the blog insecurity thing down. I really wanted to go to blissdom, but I’m not sure I would have been able to get everything from it that I needed to because of my insecurities. Maybe next year will be a better fit. But your post relates to all the other insecurities we all have. I’m taking a step out of my comfort zone today and this is just the thing I needed to read, so thank you. I love that song too. On a side note: my e-mail has been acting up and I’m not sure if things have been going out. Did you get my e-mail with my address? Have a wonderful day and thanks again.

  4. This a fantastic post Traci!! You are sooo right…we all deal with these insecurities! The evil one whispers all of these horrible thoughts and plants them in our minds! He wants us to believe these things, but we have to be wise & pray against them! So glad that you had the prayer breakfast that morning to seek out & be granted the peace that you knew Jesus would give you! His love for us is stronger than we can even comprehend! Thank you for sharing!

  5. I’m sure you posted this for me today. I’m new at this and a bit overwhelmed! I LOVE to craft and redo things, so my blog is the perfect outlet for that. I love the Lord with all my heart and I know that my desire for creating is from Him. I want to glorify and honor him through my blog.

    I was insecure at first, but I’ve been praying and I’m beginning to realize that we’re all wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters with the same struggles. I’m thrilled for those that are living out their dreams through their blogs and I hope to one day do the same. I’m going to take it one day at a time and enjoy the process!

    You’re a wonderful inspiration to me!

  6. Yes, we all deal with insecurities….in fact, sometimes I think it was invented just for me! I think part of the reason I’ve never gone to the Blissdom conference is for that very reason, I’m afraid I’d never feel “good enough” to be in such company.

    Thank you for posting with such honesty…I’m going to take those verses to heart and pull them out whenever that ol’ insecurity bug bites!


  7. Thank you for reminding me that God made me unique – not to be like everyone else. I have special gifts that I may not see or appreciate, but comparing myself to others takes my eyes off Christ. Awesome message this morning! Hugs!

  8. I was feeling this thing called : Insecurity : just this morning. I don’t know – but losing a certian (bloggy friend) follower feels like a big deal and it really shouldn’t be.

    It is what it is.

    I’ve been going down the bunny trails of what did I do or what did I say… you know?

    Just processing… and glad to know I’m not alone in this boat. ;)

  9. Great post, Traci! I’ve always read your blog because I love the projects you do (inexpensively!).

    I’ve blogged for almost 6 years, but my attitude towards blogging has changed recently. My blog is more of a family journal (no advertisers, etc), but I’ve cut back even more b/c it got to the point that I was doing a lot of “chronicling” and not a lot of “doing”.

    Keep up the great work!

  10. I definitely feel blog insecurity with my 36 followers!!! I am a mommy to a 15-month old so while it has been easier lately to have more time for my blog it still gets shoved to the side a lot of the time. I love blogging but I just do not have a lot of time to devote to it.
    Thank you for sharing.

  11. I smiled when I read this, b/c I’ve always told my kids when they’ve had a problem with someone treating them poorly, or are snobby, etc, that they are probably insecure. They say, “Mom, you always say people are insecure”. But my daughter now sees it. And why can I recognize it? Because I’m a people lol! I’m encouraged by your “realness”. I relate to it. I love people who are real! I have a feeling your intention to your blog is to encourage, and it is! We all have those inferior moments, I have them all the time, but then I try to remember Whose I am, and that I need to not take myself so seriously, people will love us or hate us. We just keep walking.

  12. Great post! It is comforting knowing that I am not the only one feeling this way at times. Although deep down, I know others go through it too.. its always good to be reassured that others have the same insecurities as well.

  13. tracy,
    thank you for the timely post. i must say that at first i was like “what?”…your blog is could you be insecure? and then my brain kicked in and i realize that our adversary is good at making us feel inadequate, even though the facts state otherwise.
    i could relate to both you and stacy (not JUST a housewife) about comparing ourselves or our blogs to others. that jealousy thing is NOT pretty. it is good to be reminded of how much God loves us and has made us to be who we are…not someone else.
    thanks for the reminder and the wonderful Word…like a healing balm to a wounded soul.

  14. I love reading your blog, especially about your Mom! I am inspired by the stories you write about your Mom, inspired to be more spiritual and impacting to my children. I also enjoy your DIY and organizational post. Keep up the great work!!!!!!!!!!

  15. I love that you are so transparent with your struggle with insecurity. I think at times we all feel this way about our lives and even in the blog world. I am also a new blogger and I try to remember that I want this to be a journal of my life and my accomplishments and my struggles. I think yours is just that too! I have a deep desire to attend a Blissdom next year and I think the thing that stops me dead in my tracks is the insecurity that I would be standing there all alone and people would be thinking what is she doing here her blog isn’t popular. I am trying to overcome that fear and be bold in my pursuit of learning and meeting fabulous women to learn from. I can see your heart in this post and it is so sweet! Blessings

  16. Traci – this post is specifically why you are one of my absolute favorite bloggers. Your humility and love for our Lord above all else are so evident in your work. Thank you for sharing these feelings and thoughts with us and reminding us (as we all need to be reminded every day) that we are good enough for God and that is all that matters. God bless you! :)

  17. Traci,
    You aren’t the only one who struggles like this for sure. It’s an every day struggle for a lot of people, including me. It starts small, but it grows out of control quickly! It ends with a heavy heart and shame. You are absolutely right in saying that all we need to be is who God made us. He knew from the beginning of time who each and every one of us would be. He gave us our strengths and abilities. We just have to choose to honor Him with them and not get caught up in our lies.
    Thanks for sharing!

  18. AMEN Traci!
    I admire you for being so transparent with your readers. If you were standing in front of me, I would give you a hug. : )

    Usually when I hear those whispers like you did, I start praying because I know those whispers are not from the Lord. So, I just redirect my thinking and pray.
    Hugs to you,

  19. Wasn’t that prayer time the best? And didn’t we need it?

    You know how sometimes you’re listening to the sermon at church and you think, “Boy, he was talking to me!” You know how that’s the Holy Spirit using those words to pierce your heart? You know what I mean, don’t you?

    Well, the Holy Spirit just used your words, my friend, for the benefit of my heart. Sometimes I feel like Insecurity is my middle name. It’s my lifelong struggle. And, really, it’s a tool of the Enemy.

    You’ve reminded me here that God wants to give me victory over the Enemy, even in this most difficult of issues. I need reminders like your post that all I have to be is me, and that being me is exactly what God wants me to do.

    You’re doing what we talked about–you’re preaching Christ. You’re telling the truth! I pray that many are blessed by it, just as I have been.

    Love you!!

  20. Oh Wow!! I think you were writing to many of us!! I have been doing my blog for almost a year and while I love my 17 followers I feel like HELLLOOO seriously, is that all the followers I’m worthy of? I get discouraged and disappointed and feel like tossing in the towel but you know what….you just reminded me of what’s really important. Thanks so much and keep on truckin’ along with your blog, you are doing good things!

  21. Nope…you are definitely not alone! I think this is one of the biggest areas we aswomen struggle with and I truly believe Satan knows when to strike and exactly how to do it! I am in a class at church on Wed nights and one of our rules is you can’t have negative self talk and you can’t compare yourself to others…it’s almost comical now when one of us tries to “break” the rules, another girl will just stop them right in their tracks :) It’s so easy to do and to fall into that trap.
    Thanks for sharing your heart to us through your wonderful blog :)

  22. Such a beautiful post…THANKYOU! I think we all struggle with insecurity. I am so thankful Jesus is our firm foundation. When we try to find our security in things, we will always come up short. I read your blog on a regular basis. I think it’s pretty wonderful!

  23. Thank you for sharing this with us. As you can see from your comments it was a very popular post and right on the mark for women. I guess all of us compare ourselves. This is a huge problem for me. And yes I’ve looked at your life and thought, Wow Traci has the perfect life and family. Shes beautiful, with a beautiful home and very creative and talented and on top of all that she has the most generous, kind spirit. Never would I have thought that you had to deal with insecurities. You’d think I would be to old to be that naive, but apparently not. We all have those insecurities. Thank you for making me feel a little more comfortable with that thought and reminding me that Jesus made me and that means he accepted me maybe I should too.

    I’ve been wanting to come by and share a post on my blog with you. Actually you inspired it. When I read the story about the house you wanted to buy I decided I needed to post about my house. I just now got around to it. Check it out when you have time, part I is here:
    and part II is here:

    Have a wonderful evening…Tracy :)

  24. HI Traci! I’m sure I’m going to echo so many others’ comments above, but it’s refreshing ~ at your expense, I guess LOL ~ to see someone who I look up to as a premiere blogger voice insecurities about her own blog . . . one I consider to be among my top 10! But, I truly “get it”, about the insecurities you’ve mentioned in other facets of our life. I’m about to turn 47, and I find myself more and more questioning what my contributions have been ~ have I been the best wife, mother, daughter, friend. Did I do enough with my life? Have I settled for mediocrity in my life when I could have done bigger and better things? I think these thoughts are common to all us humans at one time or another. Thank you for your witness, and reminding us all of Christ’s love for us and the simple comfort that comes from just knowing that.

    Thank you, Traci.

  25. Traci,

    Thank you so much for being so humble and honest, what a blessing and encouragement it was to get those scriptures in my email today (not to mention Amy!) I have just fallen in love with your blog.

    Now you listen to me, every time you have one of those thoughts I want you to march yourself into your bedroom and open that closet door and look at that cute lamp and little birdie and all those wire baskets and say, “Wow, I rock!” Because you do! God has given you such an amazing talent for putting together colors and textures and patterns. It is a joy to see and so inspiring.


  26. I have been in that INSECURITY position so many times. It sure is miserable, isn’t it. As I get older :) I have come to the conclusion that many people, even those who appear most confident, are kind of insecure too. I tried an experiment about two years ago that has served me well going into INSECURE situations. I pray: Lord, let me be a blessing to each person at this event. Honestly, He has never failed to answer that prayer. Love your blog, thanks for being so open and honest about this area where we all struggle.

  27. Thank you for sharing Traci and for being so honest with us all. I have been struggling with insecurity in general, as I don’t have a blog. I am battling depression right now and insecurity seems to have come along for the ride. I just joined a woman’s bible study and am starting to feel the light of God’s love and mercy shine down on me. I have been a long time Christian, but have let the everyday struggles and the big traumas that have happened especially over this last year get the best of me. I know that everyday that passes it will all get better, and that God can change my heart to accept the things I cannot change. His word is working on changing my mind by it being renewed everyday I read more of His word, filled with his promises. Some day’s I feel like I take 2 steps back… but I seem to have finally found the courage to get back up and fight. Whereas the last year or so I haven’t so much as shielded myself it seems. On another note, I think you are a wonderful person and blogger. I enjoy getting your emails in my in-box and checking out whatever new project you have going on. You have my same style and I love all the ideas you have given me for my own home. You inspire me and most importantly I love that you are a Christian and that you can be real with all of us through life’s struggles. I feel like that is the way I have always been too. I love it when I can connect with others that are just like me.
    Love and Blessings,

  28. Great post!
    There’s NO way you can attend a blogging conference and not compare…I struggle with insecurity all.the.time. I have added it to my gratitude list, though because it keeps me close to HIM!

  29. I can so totally relate to this blog – that little voice that roars like a lion ….. I love the scriptures – these I need to embed in my heart to counteract the voice of doubt!

  30. Traci, your post really touched me. I’d never heard that Amy Grant song before, it was a great message straight to me. Thank you.

  31. i love this post! i think we have all felt this way at some point or another. thank you for making us all realize that we are truly all alike is some small ways!! blessings to you!

  32. GREAT post Traci! You’re right, it’s sooo easy for us blog readers to read these wonderful blogs & feel a little bit intimated by them. Your humbleness is inspiring as well as your love for God. Thank you for being real!!

  33. This is what I love about you…your complete honesty. I feel like this so often, and it’s hard not to act on those feelings, even in very small ways. It’s such a bitter trap! I am so happy to hear about the complete peace that you were seeking today :)

  34. I also feel the same. My blog isn’t even a year old, but I am constantly second guessing even beginning this journey. Do I have any good to tell? Will anyone ever read it? Is my purpose for my family or whoever? Should I try to grow it? Should I do giveaways? Is it self serving to try to gain followers? Do I really want people seeing inside my life?

    I am still struggling. Your words were very meaningful. Thanks for the thoughts. They touched me today.

    Judy :)

  35. I loved your post today. I am not a blogger myself, but a faithful reader of many. I appreciate your willingness to show the “real” you. “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord….”

  36. Have I felt any of those things? Yep, yep, yep…yep. I’m working on being myself. You have a way with words…thanks for this post. LOVE your red sweater by the way!

  37. Oh girl you have hit the nail on the head!! I’ve recently dealt with lots of insecurities that continually pop up and those swirling lies from the enemy pop in to my head, too. Sometimes they pop out and I had a friend tell me “STOP IT – That’s NOT true”! Thank God for friends like that.
    I feel insecure when no one comments on my blog, that I don’t have a lot of followers, that so and so took my blog off of her favorites blogroll and why?, I can’t take pics like that person, etc etc.
    Thank you so much for being transparent enough to open up – confess those lies that are from the enemy and back them up with scriptures that are TRUTH because it will set us free! God bless, my dear.

  38. Thanks for posting this Traci! You know my thoughts and I am glad we got to share our hearts and insecurities at Blissdom. God Does have plans for all of us. Plans that are unique as each of us are unique! I pray I can hear HIM so I can follow the plans and paths that HE has in mind. I know the Lord has a wonderful things in store for you!

    Love you sister in Christ,

  39. I love your blog! It’s hard for me not to get caught up in wanting to look and be like another blogger. But then I ask myself, who am I in this to please? Man? or God? I want my blog, what I write about and share to bring glory to God. I know God has a unique purpose for me as a blogger, and for you as well!

  40. I think It takes a lot of courage to lay out your insecurities for all to see. I would have never guessed that you felt that way. Your blog is both warm and charming.
    Unfortunately I am no stranger to insecurities and blogging seems riddled with opportunities for them to raise their ugly heads. Most bloggers work hard a putting their best foot forward and that can come across as more perfect than things really are. I frequently need to remind myself that the number of followers or comments are not the reason I blog and that I read other blogs for inspiration not competition.
    Thank you for being to real about how you feel. It seems that you are not alone and knowing others struggle with insecurities makes me feel much less alone.

  41. what a blessing you and your blog are to me! thanks for sharing your heart today. I struggle with SO many if not more of the same things as you. I blogged about it once and felt so free afterward. free to be me, with stains on my shirt, ratty hair and a bad attitude sometimes. thanks again. keep up the good work!

  42. Thanks so much for the truly inspiring and moving post, Traci! I have bookmarked it and am sure I will be referring to it often for the reminder!

  43. I don’t know how you always manage to do this, but you do. I had no intentions of being emotional when I read this post. I wasn’t. Until the song. I haven’t heard that song in ages. I listened to it and realized I still remembered every word. I have a friend going through some things and I’m going to send her this video. God uses you in ways you don’t even know.

  44. You have hit the spot! I started a blog a few months ago and only posted a few times, I feel like even though i have things to put on it they aren’t good enough…..but you’re right and He made me how I am and I am perfect just the way I am! thank you! I’m going to write john 14:27 on my kitchen blackboard!

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