Hello from the west coast, friends!
I hope you had a great week! Jonathan and I haven’t had much to do this weekend, so we have been enjoying some down time.
I wanted to share with you something I have been thinking a lot about lately. Mostly because we came home before Christmas without our girl.
I’ve been thinking about how many times our lives make no sense what-so-ever! Just when we think we’ve got things figured out, we get the breath knocked out of us. Have you ever been there? Or are you there right now?
When we were overseas, and we knew we were going home without our girl, it was super hard to make sense of anything. I know I haven’t shared the full story here on the blog, but I do feel like you need to know that it was our decision to leave, not the governments. We cannot fully explain the circumstances, but please know that we prayed and cried out to the Lord for direction, and we felt him leading us back home. There were situations and circumstances that we were not aware of or prepared for, and maybe someday, I will be able to share more.
Our last day over there, I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. I was speaking with our lawyer over there, who was a beautiful Christian young women, and she was trying to comfort me with the story of “the tapestry.” I knew I had heard that story before, but I couldn’t remember when.
This week, I was reminded of where I had heard it before when I was reading “Reflections of God’s Glory” by the precious Corrie ten Boom in my hotel room. (I don’t think it was a coincidence that God brought this story to me again shortly after hearing it from our lawyer.) :)
Cornelia “Corrie” ten Boom was a Dutch Christian who, along with her father and other family members, helped many Jews escape the Nazi Holocaust during World War II. She was imprisoned for her actions. –wikipedia
She is most well known for her book “The Hiding Place” that was made into a movie, and she traveled the world telling others about the love of God. Corrie passed away in 1983.
Here is what I read in the book, and the pictures are the actual tapestry that Corrie held as she told this story….
As she spoke, she slowly unfolded the purple cloth in her hands and revealed hundreds of strings tied in knots and pulled through the cloth. It all looked so random. She showed the children how the strings didn’t seem to make sense from where they sat at her feet on the floor in the living room.
“That’s the whole point,” she exclaimed. She said it was because of our limited vision, our limited perspective of what God is doing in our lives, that we question Him.
At that point Tante (aunt) Corrie slowly turned the purple tangled mess around to reveal a beautiful tapestry: a crown of gold with multicolored jewels.
“This” she said, “is what God sees….from His perspective….a masterpiece!”
-Reflections of God’s Glory, Corrie ten Boom
I believe this illustration is something everyone of us can relate to. Life just doesn’t make sense most of the time, does it?!
Well, truthfully, I don’t know if it is supposed to? I think it is in the “messiness” of life that we are to trust in God. If our lives were perfect, would we have need of Him? I doubt it. I know that in the darkest times of my life, I have felt the presence of God the most. And I love knowing that God is weaving a beautiful tapestry of my life even when it looks like a bunch of mixed up knots!
Grant Colfax Tullar wrote this poem about the tapestry, actually called “The Weaver,” and I wanted to share it with you…
Notice that it says that the dark threads are as needful as the threads of gold and silver. The Master Weaver needs them both to create a masterpiece.
Right now, I feel that God is weaving threads of black and gold/silver in my life. I have the dark threads of confusion and sadness over our adoption, and yet I have the bright shiny colors of gold and silver as I celebrate this special time in Jonathan’s life. And from my perspective, I don’t know what in the world God is doing?!! But I find comfort knowing that He knows EXACTLY what he is doing. He is using all of the colors of my life to weave something beautiful. And I am forever grateful.
Friends, you may be living on that messy side of the tapestry right now, and you have NO idea how God is going to weave something beautiful on the other side. But trust me, He is. He loves you and desires His best for you.
Keep on trusting. Keep on believing. He is weaving your life into a masterpiece as we speak. :)